They don’t even say ‘No’. They don’t actually tell you. There is this gradual realisation that you haven’t been selected. You were not chosen. You didn’t make the cut.
And we can attach all the meanings in the world to it can’t we?
We can blame the system. Too many applications. Not enough time to give any their full attention. I don’t tick the minority boxes they’re trying to fill this year.
We can blame them. They must have missed our brilliance. They just can’t see our magic. They’d already decided, it’s just a con asking people to apply.
Or we can blame ourselves. Tell ourselves we’re too this, or not enough that. We can blame it on our application, say we were tired when we did it or not in the right energy. We can find any manner of ways to dress up the belief that we’re not good enough.
But do you know what?
It is possible to not be selected for something, and be good enough!
Gatekeepers have to be selective. And by the very nature of it all, they are also subjective. There is no winner in art. No better, no worse. No defining measure.
The thing is, sometimes we get selected for stuff, and sometimes we don’t.
For the 2nd year running, I was not selected to share my poems at Glastonbury Festival.
Yay!!!
I like to believe the idea of REJECTION begin REDIRECTION.
A few years back I’d just finished a 6 month contract up in Scotland. One of the best jobs ever. I was working for the RSPB sharing my passion for nature and wildlife at the Loch Garten Osprey Centre. 6 beautiful months of talking about wildlife every working day and then spending days off, exploring the mountains, the lochs, the coastlines and beaches of the Highlands of Scotland.
And then the end of the contract was approaching. I had somewhere to live after finishing, and I needed to get a job. The perfect role came up. Another RSPB job, (I’d been with them in various roles for a few years now and was eager to try more) in their training department, and I believed it was mine. A close friend of mine was also applying.
To cut a long and fairly agonising story short, he got the job. I did not. I was beyond gutted. My future and all my plans had been built on this new role. I would have been off around the country, meeting new people, seeing more wildlife and generally having the best time.
But, it was not to be.
So after sitting, walking and feeling all my feelings for about a week, I applied for another job. In the RSPB’s media team. Not a big fan of ‘the media’ these days but at the time I was just viewing it as telling stories which is something I like to do. I got the job! I began. And though the team were lovely and I was now working in the buzzing head office, I was feeling my energy suppressed and stifled. Not only did I get to write stories, but I also had to read newspapers!!! Yuck. So draining and full of negativity.
So I was sitting one day at my desk, listening to a conversation between a member of the events team and my team and I was suddenly engaged and interested. My brain was ticking. Hmmm, I wonder how I could work in that team? How could I get her job? Events are fun and that’s a bit more my bag.
Well, amazingly about a week later, that very person announced she was leaving the team!!!
I was astounded. Delighted, excited and super grateful.
I applied and I got the job. I joined the team and learned a lot.
Starting my role at one of their biggest annual events, I knew in a moment, I was where I was meant to be. I experienced a great deal of variety, adventure, challenges and successes. I was able to lead an event with over 20 nature organisations, at the Natural History Museum where David Attenborough appeared as our guest speaker!
It was a fabulous time.
And over the time there, I met a guy from their Scottish team and we got on really well.
Some years later, after I’d left work to raise my children, I accepted an invitation by this guy to ‘like’ his wife’s business page.
And then my whole world really shifted. His wife was training to be a transformational coach and I signed up for a free session while she was training. And it blew my mind.
It started a cascade of movement for me into doing the ‘inner work’ and understanding myself, my feelings and my needs. I learned how to love myself.
I then trained as a transformational coach myself and have helped many others take steps into a life they never knew was waiting for them.
I started my own journey hosting dance events and believing in myself.
And then when the signs were pulling me to write and share, I listened to the call.
If I’d have got that job in the training team all those years ago, I don’t know how my journey would have been different.
But yesterday, when I should/could/would have been at Glastonbury festival preparing for my set, I spent the day with my children and friends at the river and had one of the most glorious days of my life. I actually cried, stood on the bank, watching my son swimming around, playing with our little inflatable dinghy and having the best time.
I even pushed my fears by jumping in the river from the bank!
I have no doubt that all the performers at Glastonbury Festival this week will have the best time, for them. And I also have no doubt that everything that comes my way is absolutely perfect.
I’m grateful for this amazing life, my place within it and the incredible opportunities that keep on coming. And I’m grateful for having the belief in myself to take them.
Where are you feeling a NO when it might be a YES?
Where are you being REDIRECTED?
Have a beautiful day xxxx
Comments